SO Relatable

Next Time Your Friend Tries To Be A Wine Snob, Tell Them About These Experiments

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FROM VIRALNOVA:

I’ll never forget the day when I sat down to watch a documentary and was verbally assaulted with this statement: “This wine has notes of tennis ball and garden hose.”

That is (a paraphrased version of) an actual sentence uttered by an insufferable snob from a film called “Somm.” I know that everyone has their thing, but watching grown-ass adults talking about the base notes in wine in comparison to garden tools for hours on end felt like a form of punishment.

And since I’m a glutton for the stuff, I tuned in until the end. Don’t get me wrong. I love wine. Most people love wine, but sommeliers are known the world over for being the most hardcore winos of all.

But are they really onto something with all that sniffing, spitting, comparison-making insanity? If you ask some researchers, probably not.

According to one decidedly unenthused announcer from Freakonomics Radio, “Wine experts should just put a cork in it.”

According to one decidedly unenthused announcer from Freakonomics Radio, "Wine experts should just put a cork in it."

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Why, you ask? Aside from opening up the possibility of making any friends ever, sommeliers should probably just throw in the towel for the sake of not lying professionally.

Why, you ask? Aside from opening up the possibility of making any friends ever, sommeliers should probably just throw in the towel for the sake of not lying professionally.

iStock

“This wine has notes of oak, wet grass, and a lifetime without friendship.”

Call me unrefined, but something tells me that there is no possible way that one could tell the month and year in which a particular wine was bottled. To be fair, I once bought a wine called BearBoat solely because the label was stamped with an adorable bear sitting in a boat. I may not be the best judge here.

So without getting into formal wine-tasting jargon, let’s take a look at a few experiments run by the likes of Harvard economists and California vintners.

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